Monday, May 19, 2014

Change is hard!

A lot has been going on in our crazy lives lately. A lot of change. I am not a huge fan of change. I mean little changes here and there like re arranging my living room, painting the walls, a new haircut, a different car, things like that I feel like I constantly have to do to keep me on my toes. I'm talking about major changes. I've experienced quite a few of those lately. None of them are bad at all just pretty major in my life. I, like most women, overanalyze EVERYTHING and end up with a ton of anxiety.

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My mother's day was great! I got sick the Thursday before mother's day and wasn't any better on Sunday. My husband got up and helped with the kids and let me sleep in a bit. Before long, my kids were all in my bed with me telling me they're sad I was sick and my 9 year old, Noah, brought me a paper he wrote about me. AJ, my 5 year old, planted a sunflower at preschool for my present but informed me that he'd be keeping it in his room. Once I got up and moving around, we packed up the car and headed out of town to go to my parents house in Fruita, CO. I got to spend mother's day with my sweet mama and my youngest brother, Jacob, was graduating high school that Tuesday, May 13. We also got to Skype my brother, Josh, who is currently serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. That was a lot of fun. He is so funny and just so happy all the time! I sure miss him!

Better watch out! I even know how to multiply!!!
 
 
Elder J. Charles Johnson
 
I just want to talk about my mama for a minute. She is the most amazing woman I know. I am her oldest child and definitely her most difficult. No matter what I did, I could always count on her to be there for me, even when I didn't want her to be there. It wasn't until I had children of my own that I began to understand and appreciate everything she's done for me and all the worrying and counseling she gave me. When I graduated High School, I felt like I didn't have the freedom I wanted so I found an apartment and moved out without giving my mom any notice and when she wasn't even home. I think we went about 2 weeks without talking because she was so hurt and I couldn't understand her hurt at the time. I didn't think I did anything wrong. Now, having children of my own and already dreading the day they leave home, I can understand 100000%. My mom just watched her last baby graduate high school on the 13th. She was so strong, she didn't cry, she was smiling, cheering, and happy. I can only imagine her conflict of emotion, being so proud of her youngest son, and yet knowing that he'll be leaving shortly to begin his life on his own. I am 8 years older than my brother, Jacob, and I did a lot of motherly things for him growing up. I was/am very emotional about the fact that he is grown up and getting ready to embark on his life and yet I know it doesn't come remotely close to a mother's feelings. The great part is that my mom can be confident that her and my dad raised some great and responsible children.
 




 



AJ is in love with Jacobs girlfriend! We tease Jacob that AJ will steal her from him but I'm pretty sure no one could! She's so sweet!


 

As soon as we got to my parents house on mother's day, Jake's dad called and said that a "tornado" took out our play set and threw it into our truck! Living in the four corners area, this is unheard of. We don't get tornados! Dust devils, yes. I wasn't here so it could've been a giant dust devil but I was told "tornado" so I'm going with that. The crazy part is that nothing else was moved, ruined or anything. I feel bad for my kids because they were really sad that they don't have a swing set anymore and it took me and Jake 4 days to build that stinkin thing. I'm just glad that none of the kids were on the play set when it happened.








AJ's last day of school was on Friday! He is officially a Kindergartener! It's crazy to me! Noah's last day will be this Friday and he will be going into 4th grade! Time is passing too quickly for this mama! After AJ's graduation, we went to the car wash and Kennady was so scared but AJ held her hand and helped her feel safe. It was really sweet. She is potty trained again. She had gotten sick after she was potty trained before and completely reverted back. BUT... Saturday, we went to lunch with Jake's cousin's family (my best friend) and we had to stop by Walmart for Jake to run in to get fertilizer for the grass and Kennady told me that she had to go potty so I took her into the restrooms and pulled down her pants and there was poop alllll over! Since I didn't know she had already gone potty in her pants and I just pulled them down I got it all over her legs. It took me forever to clean it up and I had left my phone in the truck so I couldn't even call Jake to bring me wipes or her extra pair of underwear or her pull ups that I packed lol. Poor Kennady kept telling me, "I sorry mama!" I wasn't even mad at her, I just felt bad for her because she was filthy. Potty training is not my favorite! Noah also was able to go to his cousins birthday party on his biological mom's side of the family. Even though Noah hasn't talked to her or seen her in a few years, I love and appreciate the fact that her brother and sister's families make an effort to keep a relationship with him. He had so much fun with them and he was even able to see his older brother which he doesn't get to see as much as I would like. I love my Noah faloah! Noah and AJ watched The Lone Ranger together (AJ's turn to choose the movie) and AJ fell asleep per the norm but the funny thing was what he was wearing! He loves the Lone Ranger now!





On Sunday, we got a new bishopric in our ward. I was really anxious about this all week. Not because I wasn't sure if I'd like them, just because it was unknown and I love our past bishopric. When the new bishopric was announced I felt a sense of peace right away and so much love for them. I'm so excited for our ward. Jake even came to sacrament meeting and it really made my day. I love spending time a church with my whole family. I didn't think he was going to come because that's what he told me but I said a silent prayer and I swear not even 5 minutes later Jake walked into the chapel. It was another confirmation to me of the power of prayer and that I matter to my Heavenly Father and that he is aware of my situation. I love that we can talk with our Heavenly Father and that we can ask for help.



When we got home from church the kids were playing outside and I noticed that the mama bird wasn't in her nest that she built under our porch. Then I noticed one of the eggs was on the ledge next to the nest. Before long, we had found 4 or 5 eggs all over the ground under where the nest is. I don't know what happened but all the eggs were broken. We were pretty sad about it.






This morning, I walked past AJ's room to go make sure Noah was getting ready for school, and AJ was laying in his bed looking at a picture of a little girl he has a crush on that moved to Aztec before Christmas break. When I asked him what was wrong, he buried his face in his pillow. I was so sad for him so I sent the little girl's mom a message and we're getting together on Thursday for a play date which is great because They're moving to New York on June 1st. I haven't seen AJ this happy in a long time!!!

No matter what the changes are, I am happy that I have my family to keep me grounded. I love my children and husband more than words can explain! It's pretty amazing how life can lead you where you never planned on being and it turns out greater than any plan you ever had for yourself before. Everything happens for a reason!

 
Thanks for reading! XO
Tristen

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